Please read and act, only takes a minute!
On Tuesday, the Senate health committee voted 12-11 in favor of a
two-page amendment courtesy of Republican Tom Coburn that would
require all Members and their staffs to enroll in any new
government-run health plan. It took me less than a minute to sign up
to require our congressmen and senators to drink at the same trough!
Three cheers for Congressman John Fleming of Louisiana !

Congressman John Fleming ( Louisiana physician) has proposed an
amendment that would require congressmen and senators to take the same
healthcare plan they force on us (under proposed legislation they are
curiously exempt).

Congressman Fleming is encouraging people to go on his Website and
sign his petition (very simple - just first, last and email). I have
immediately done just that at:
http://fleming.house.gov/index.cfm?sectionid=55§" title="http://fleming.house.gov/index.cfm?sectionid=55§" target="_blank"http://fleming.house.gov/inde...;iontree=29,55

Please urge as many people as you can to do the same!

If Congress forces this on the American people, the Congressmen should
have to accept the same level of health care for themselves and their
families. To do otherwise is the height of hypocrisy!

https://secure3.convio.net/aahf/site/Advocacy?cm d=display&page=UserAc tion&id=283

Health e-Tips

------------------------- ------------------------- ------------------------- -----

Stand up, speak out

The American Association for Health Freedom (AAHF) is calling the FDA out on its shoddy performance.

The FDA may have been paying a lot of lip service to transparency lately, but their lax ways are putting us all at risk. On October 26, the Government Accountability Office released a report showing that the FDA often allows drugs to remain on the market after follow-up trials show they don't work. The "fast-track drug-approval process" makes it easy for unproven drugs to reach millions of consumers. And Cocoa Krispies proudly carry the label "Now helps support your child's IMMUNITY."

It's time for FDA reform. AAHF has a petition calling for change. This petition will be delivered to Congress, letting them know that we're sick of money coming before our health.

Click here to view and sign the petition.

A married man was having an affair
with his secretary.

One day they went to her place
and made love all afternoon.

Exhausted, they fell asleep
and woke up at 8 PM.

The man hurriedly dressed
and told his lover to take his shoes
outside and rub them in the grass and dirt.

He put on his shoes and drove home.

'Where have you been?' his wife demanded.

'I can't lie to you,' he replied,

'I'm having an affair with my secretary.
We had sex all afternoon.'

She looked down at his shoes and said:

'You lying bastard!
You've been playing golf!'

The 2nd Affair

A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters
but always talked about having a son.

They decided to try one last time
for the son they always wanted.

The wife got pregnant
and delivered a healthy baby boy.

The joyful father rushed to the nursery
to see his new son.

He was horrified at the ugliest child
he had ever seen.

He told his wife: 'There's no way I can
be the father of this baby.
Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered!
Have you been fooling around behind my back?'

The wife smiled sweetly and replied:
'No, not this time!'

The 3rd Affair

A mortician was working late one night.

He examined the body of Mr. Bob,
about to be cremated,
and made a startling discovery.
Bob had the largest private part
he had ever seen!

'I'm sorry Mr. Bob,' the mortician
commented, 'I can't allow you to be cremated
with such an impressive private part.
It must be saved for posterity.'

So, he removed it,
stuffed it into his briefcase,
and took it home.

'I have something to show
you won't believe,' he said to his wife,
opening his briefcase.

'My God!' the wife exclaimed,
'Bob is dead!'

The 4th Affair

A woman was in bed with her lover
when she heard her husband
opening the front door.

'Hurry,' she said, 'stand in the corner.'

She rubbed baby oil all over him,
then dusted him with talcum powder.

'Don't move until I tell you,'
she said. 'Pretend you're a statue.'

'What's this?' the husband inquired
as he entered the room.

'Oh it's a statue,' she replied.
'The Smiths bought one and I liked it
so I got one for us, too.'

No more was said,
not even when they went to bed.

Around 2 AM the husband got up,
went to the kitchen and returned!
with a sandwich and a beer..

'Here,' he said to the statue, have this.
I stood like that for two days at the Smiths
and nobody offered me a damned thing.'

The 5th Affair

A man walked into a cafe,
went to the bar and ordered a beer.

'Certainly, Sir, that'll be one cent.'

'One Cent?' the man exclaimed.

He glanced at the menu and asked:
'How much for a nice juicy steak
and a bottle of wine?'

'A nickel,' the barman replied.

'A nickel?' exclaimed the man.
'Where's the guy who owns this place?'

The bartender replied:
'Upstairs, with my wife.'

The man asked: 'What's he doing upstairs
with your wife?'

The bartender replied:
'The same thing I'm doing
to his business down here.'

The 6th Affair

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside.

He looked up and said weakly:
'I have something I must confess.'

'There's no need to, 'his wife replied...

'No,' he insisted,
'I want to die in peace.
I slept with your sister, your best friend,
her best friend, and your mother!'

'I know,' she replied.
'Now just rest and let the poison work.'

As a sobering example of how members of Congress can be spoon-fed the views and even the exact words of high-powered lobbying firms, consider remarks inserted into the Congressional Record after the debate and vote on health care reform in the House.

Statements by more than a dozen lawmakers were ghostwritten, in whole or in part, by Washington lobbyists working for Genentech, one of the world's largest biotechnology companies.

E-mail messages obtained by The New York Times show that the lobbyists drafted one statement for Democrats and another for Republicans.

The lobbyists, employed by Genentech and by two Washington law firms, were remarkably successful in getting the statements printed in the Congressional Record under the names of different members of Congress.

The apparent goal was to show that, even though there were sharp divisions between the parties on the overall reform bill (only one Republican voted for it), there was bipartisan support for provisions relating to drugs produced by the biotechnology industry. One provision, for example, would allow generic competition to expensive biological drugs but only after the original manufacturer had enjoyed 12 years of exclusive use, a generous period by anyone's standards.

Asked about the Congressional statements, a lobbyist close to Genentech said: "This happens all the time. There was nothing nefarious about it."

Alaska

More than half of the coastline of the entire United States is in Alaska .
(I disagree!)

Amazon

The Amazon rainforest produces more than 20% the world's oxygen supply.

The Amazon River pushes so much water into the Atlantic Ocean that, more than one hundred miles at sea off the mouth of the river, one can dip fresh water out of the ocean. The volume of water in the Amazon river is greater than the next eight largest rivers in the world combined and three times the flow of all rivers in the United States .

Antarctica

Antarctica is the only land on our planet that is not owned by any country.

Ninety percent of the world's ice covers Antarctica . This ice also represents seventy percent of all the fresh water in the world. As strange as it sounds, however, Antarctica is essentially a desert. The average yearly total precipitation is about two inches Although covered with ice (all but 0..4% of it, ice.), Antarctica is the driest place on the planet, with an absolute humidity lower than the Gobi desert.

Brazil

Brazil got its name from the nut, not the other way around.

Canada

Canada has more lakes than the rest of the world combined. Canada is an Indian word meaning ' Big Village .'


Chicago

Next to Warsaw , Chicago has the largest Polish population in the world.

Detroit

Woodward Avenue in Detroit, Michigan, carries the designation M-1, so named because it was the first paved road anywhere.


Damascus, Syria

Damascus, Syria, was flourishing a couple of thousand years before Rome was founded in 753 BC, making it the oldest continuously inhabited city in existence.

Istanbul, Turkey

Istanbul, Turkey, is the only city in the world located on two continents.

Los Angeles

Los Angele's full name is El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reina de Los Angeles de Porciuncula -- and can be abbreviated to 3.63% of its size: L.A.


New York City

The term 'The Big Apple' was coined by touring jazz musicians of the 1930's who used the slang expression 'apple' for any town or city. Therefore, to play New York City is to play the big time - The Big Apple.

There are more Irish in New York City than in Dublin , Ireland ; more Italians in New York City than in Rome, Italy ; and more Jews in New York City than in Tel Aviv, Israel .

Ohio

There are no natural lakes in the state of Ohio , everyone is manmade.

Pitcairn Island

The smallest island with country status is Pitcairn in Polynesia , at just 1.75 sq. miles/4,53 sq. km.

Rome

The first city to reach a population of 1 million people was Rome , Italy in 133 B.C. There is a city called Rome on every continent.

Siberia

Siberia contains more than 25% of the world's forests.

S.M.O.M .

The actual smallest sovereign entity in the world is the Sovereign Military Order of Malta (S.M.O.M). It is located in the city of Rome, Italy, has an area of two te nn is courts, and as of 2001 has a population of 80, 20 less people than the Vatican. It is a sovereign entity under international law, just as the Vatican is.

Sahara Desert

In the Sahara Desert , there is a town named Tidikelt , Algeria , which did not receive a drop of rain for ten years.

Technically though, the driest place on Earth is in the valleys of the Antarctic near Ross Island . There has been no rainfall there for two million years..

Spain

Spain literally means 'the land of rabbits.'


St. Paul , Mi nn esota

St. Paul, Mi nn esota , was originally called Pig's Eye after a man named Pierre 'Pig's Eye' Parrant who set up the first business there.

Roads

Chances that a road is unpaved in the U.S.A : 1%, in Canada : 75%

Russia

The deepest hole ever drilled by man is the Kola Superdeep Borehole, in Russia .. It reached a depth of 12,261 meters (about 40,226 feet or 7.62 miles). It was drilled for scientific research and gave up some unexpected discoveries, one of which was a huge deposit of hydrogen - so massive that the mud coming from the hole was "boiling" with it.

United States

The Eisenhower interstate system requires that one-mile in every five must be straight. These straight sections are usable as airstrips in times of war or other emergencies.


Waterfalls

The water of Angel Falls (the World's highest) in Venezuela drops 3,212 feet (979 meters). They are 15 times higher than Niagara Falls .

I have always said , you should learn something new every day.

Unfortunately, many of us are at that age where what we learn today, we forget tomorrow.

But, give it a shot anyway

Chronicles 28:9 For the Lord searches all hearts, and understands all thoughts of minds

Please find below my suggestion for fixing America's economy. Instead of giving billions of dollars to companies that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan. You can call it "The Patriotic Retirement Plan":

There are about 40 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them $1 million apiece severance for early retirement with the following stipulations:

1) They MUST retire. Forty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.

2) They MUST buy a new American CAR. Forty million cars ordered - Auto Industry fixed.

3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - Housing Crisis fixed.

It can't get any easier than that!!

P.S. If more money is needed, have all members in Congress pay their taxes...

Mr. President, while you're at it, make Congress retire on Social Security and Medicare. I'll bet both programs would be fixed pronto!

If you think this would work, please forward to everyone you know.

If not, please disregard.

Finally ..... A Sensible Gun Registration Plan That Will Work

Vermont State Rep. Fred Maslack has read the Second Amendment to the U.S.Constitution, as well as Vermont 's own Constitution very carefully, and his strict interpretation of these documents is popping some eyeballs in New England and elsewhere.

Maslack recently proposed a bill to register "non-gun-owners" ; and require
them to pay a $500 fee to the state. Thus Vermont would become the first state to require a permit for the luxury of going about unarmed and assess a fee of $500 for the privilege of not owning a gun.

Maslack read the "militia" phrase of the Second Amendment as not only affirming the right of the individual citizen to bear arms, but as a clear mandate to do so. He believes that universal gun ownership was advocated by the Framers of the Constitution as an antidote to a "monopoly of force" by the government as well as criminals.

Vermont 's constitution states explicitly that "the people have a right to bear arms for the defense of themselves and the State" and those persons who are "conscientiously scrupulous of bearing arms" shall be required to "pay such equivalent." Clearly, says Maslack, Vermonters have a constitutional obligation to arm themselves, so that they are capable of responding to "any situation that may arise."

Under the bill, adults who choose not to own a firearm would be required to register their name, address, Social Security Number, and driver's license number with the state. "There is a legitimate government interest in knowing who is not prepared to defend the state should they be asked to do so," Maslack says.

Vermont already boasts a high rate of gun ownership along with the least
restrictive laws of any state .. it's currently the only state that allows a citizen to carry a concealed firearm without a permit. This combination of plenty of guns and few laws regulating them has resulted in a crime rate that is the third lowest in the nation.

" America is at that awkward stage. It's too late to work within the system, but too early to shoot the bastards."

This makes sense! There is no reason why gun owners should have to pay taxes to support police protection for people not wanting to own guns. Let them contribute their fair share and pay their own way.

Deadlier than Cocaine, Heroin, and the Swine Flu?
Dr. Mercola
Addiction to prescription painkillers - which kill thousands of Americans a year - has become a largely unrecognized epidemic, experts say.
In fact, prescription drugs cause most of the more than 26,000 fatal overdoses each year, says Leonard Paulozzi of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

The number of overdose deaths from opioid painkillers - opium-like drugs that include morphine and codeine - more than tripled from 1999 to 2006, to 13,800 deaths that year, according to recently released CDC statistics.

In the past, most overdoses were due to illegal narcotics, such as heroin, with most deaths in big cities. Prescription painkillers have now surpassed heroin and cocaine however, as the leading cause of fatal overdoses, Paulozzi says.

Experts say it's easy to see why so many Americans are abusing painkillers. As Americans age and carry extra pounds, more are asking for pain relief to cope with joint problems, back pain and other ailments.

The FDA Really Does Hate Diabetics

Killer diabetes drug Byetta has once again been linked to severe organ damage and death... and the FDA has once again made them (can you guess?) change the warning label.

Last year, it was increased risk of hemorrhagic pancreatitis (which caused several deaths) that got added to the label. This year, it's kidney problems - including 62 cases of acute kidney failure - which can be fatal.

What will it take for the FDA to stop messing around with the label and pull this dangerous drug from the market? I hope the answer isn't thousands of deaths.

--Michele

The liberals are asking us to give Obama time.
We agree and think 25 to life would be appropriate.
**********************

America needs Obamacare like Nancy Pelosi needs a Halloween mask.
**********************

Q: Have you heard about McDonalds new Obama Value Meal?
A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it.
**********************

Q: What does Barack Obama call lunch with a convicted felon?
A: A fund raiser.
**********************

Q: What do Vanilla Ice, Eminem and Barack Obama have in common?
A: They all made careers pretending to be black men.
**********************

Q: What's the difference between Obama's cabinet and a penitentiary?
A: One is filled with tax evaders, blackmailers and threats to society.
The other is for housing prisoners.
**********************
Q: What's the difference between Simba and Obama?
A: Simba is an African lion while Obama is a lyin African.
**********************

On Halloween you put on a false face and trick people.
This year Barack Obama is going as - Barack Obama.
**********************

If Nancy Pelosi and Obama were on a boat in the middle of the ocean and
It started to sink, who would be saved? .... America !
**********************

Q: What's the difference between Obama and his dog, Bo?
A: Bo has papers.

4 Kings 23:7 He destroyed also the pavilions of the effeminate,
which were in the house of the Lord...

1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He
thought he was God and I didn't.

2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

3.. I Work Hard Because Millions On Welfare Depend on Me!

4.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill
them.

5.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

6.. Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.

7.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me

8.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

9.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

10.. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are missing.

11.. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

12. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy,
why-the-heck-is-the-room- spinning medicine.

13.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

14.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

15.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

16.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

17.. Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!

18.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I
Grew up.

19.. Procrastinate Now!

20. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With
That?

21.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

22.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance

23.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!

24..They call it PMS because MadCow Disease was already taken.

25.He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead.

26..A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three
thousand times the memory.

27..Ham and eggs. A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime
commitment for a pig.

28.. The trouble with life is there's no background music.

29.. The original point and click interface was a Smith and
Wesson.

30.. I smile because I don't know what the heck is going
on.

Getting Out Of Bed
A man went to the hospital to have his wedding ring
Cut off from his willy.
According to the attending Nurse, the girl friend found the ring in his
pants pocket and she got so mad at him, she used petroleum jelly to slip
the ring on his willy while he was asleep.

I don't know what's worse:

1) Having your girl friend find out you're married.

2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring
Got on your willy.

3) Or finding out your willy fits through your Wedding Ring !

Dining Out In The World

Click here: http://www.fekids.com/img/kln/flash/DontGro ssOutTheWorld.swf" title="http://www.fekids.com/img/kln/flash/DontGro ssOutTheWorld.swf" target="_blank"http://www.fekids.com/img/kln... .com/img/kln/flash/DontGro ssOutTheWorld.swf

Deuteronomy 32:29O that you would be wise and would understand, and
would provide for thy last end.

The farmer agreed to deliver the mule the next day.

The next morning the farmer drove up and said, "Sorry, fellows, I have some bad news, the mule died last night."

Curtis & Leroy replied, "Well, then just give us our money back."

The farmer said, "Can't do that. I went and spent it already."

They said, "OK then, just bring us the dead mule."

The farmer asked, "What in the world ya'll gonna do with a dead mule?"

Curtis said, "We gonna raffle him off."

The farmer said, "You can't raffle off a dead mule!"

Leroy said, "We shore can! Heck, we don't hafta tell nobody he's dead!"

A couple of weeks later, the farmer ran into Curtis &Leroy at the Piggly Wiggly grocery store and asked..

"What'd you fellers ever do with that dead mule?"

They said,"We raffled him off like we said we wuz gonna do."

Leroy said,"Shucks, we sold 500 tickets fer two dollars apiece and made a profit of $898."

The farmer said,"My Lord, didn't anyone complain?"

Curtis said, "Well, the feller who won got upset. So we gave him his two dollars back."

Curtis and Leroy now work for the government.

They're overseeing the Bailout Program.

Limit all US politicians to two terms.

One in office

One in prison

Illinois already does this

1. Tell President Obama to Rescind Dangerous, Unnecessary Health Emergency giving unprecedented powers to Secretary Sebelius to set us a medical internment system without appeal or protections. Take this item once for every member of your household:

http://salsa.democracyinaction.org/o/568/t/1128/p/dia/ac tion/public/?action_KEY=1 610" title="http://salsa.democracyinaction.org/o/568/t/1128/p/dia/ac tion/public/?action_KEY=1 610" target="_blank"http://salsa.democracyinactio...

This woman has totally sold out the American People,
When she signed the document that says Big Pharma cannot be sued for any damages their "swinee flu" shot does...So they have no incentive to make it safe at all!! She sold us down the river, to guarantee their big profits...at our expense!!!!

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University ..

On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air.

The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.

He got down on one knee, inspected the elephants foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it.

As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his knife,

after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot.

The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments..

Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled.

Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away.

Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenage son.

As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and

walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing.

The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down.

The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help wondering if this was the same elephant.

Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing, and made his way into the enclosure.

He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder.

The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs

and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.

Probably wasn't the same elephant.

This is for everyone who sends me those heart-

warming bullshit stories..

Great laugh!!!!!!!

And Again!! Deuteronomy 16:16 No one shall appear with his hands empty before the
Lord.

An old prospector shuffled into town leading an old tired mule. The old man headed
straight for the only saloon in town to clear his parched throat.

He walked up to the saloon and tied his old mule to the hitch rail. As he stood there
brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out
of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.

The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, 'Hey old man, have
you ever danced?'

The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, 'No, I never did dance,just never wanted to.'

A crowd had gathered quickly and the gunslinger grinned and said, 'Well, you old fool,
you're gonna' dance now,' and started shooting at the old man's feet. The old prospector
in order to not get a toe blow off or his boots perforated was soon hopping around like a
flea on a hot skillet and everybody was laughing fit to be tied.

When the last bullet had been fired the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his
gun and turned around to go back into the saloon. The old man turned to his pack mule,
pulled out a double barreled shotgun, and cocked both hammers back. The loud, audible
double clicks carried clearly through the desert air.

The crowd stopped laughing immediately. The young gunslinger heard the sounds, too,
and he turned around very slowly. The quiet was almost deafening.

The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the old timer and the large gaping
holes of those twin barrels. He found it hard to swallow. The barrels of the shotgun
never wavered in the old man's hands.

The old man said, 'Son, did you ever kiss a mule's ass?'

The boy bully swallowed hard and said, 'No. But I've always wanted to.'

There are two lessons for us all:
1. Don't waste ammunition.
2. Don't mess with old people.

I just love a story with a happy ending